Orange candy.....

“Ummm... orange candy.”

Till date, this is the answer I have received from almost every person I have asked to make a choice after stopping next to an ice-creamwale bhaiya. And during one of these post-dinner ice-candy strolls, a friend and I made what I believe are some fairly important observations about the orange candy.

To begin with, there are essentially two kinds: icy and juicy. The classic example of the icy variety is the Mother Dairy orange candy; the juicy variety is best represented by Vadilal. This distinction may seem inconsequential to the casual orange-candy consumer. It is not. So, in the interest of rigorous analysis, let us consider the relative merits of the two.

The Icy, or Mother Dairy, Type

This, I suspect, is what most people imagine when they ask for an orange candy.

It is optimally sweet. More importantly, it has the correct structural composition for what I consider to be the defining orange-candy experience: sucking the juice out of it until you're left with increasingly pale ice.

There is something eternally satisfying about watching the color slowly disappear as you work your way through the candy. It does, however, have certain structural weaknesses.

Most significantly, the candy has an unfortunate tendency to fall off the stick just as you are midway through sucking it. This is particularly devastating because by then you have invested considerable time and emotional energy in the endeavor.

There is also the geometrical problem.

Eventually, you reach a stage where you have sucked the color out of every accessible edge, while a stubborn orange region remains around the stick. There is no obvious way of reaching this final reservoir without looking somewhat ridiculous.

One must therefore choose between dignity and completion. Finally, your hands will probably get sticky—something you generally discover only after finishing the candy and touching something you would rather not have made sticky. Still, these are relatively minor inconveniences in an otherwise excellent product.

The Juicy, or Vadilal, Type

The juicy orange candy initially appears to be the more sophisticated specimen. It is more coherent. More uniform. Presumably better quality. Unfortunately, it is also slightly sweeter than you expect an orange candy to be.

Rather than possessing the gloriously crystalline composition of the icy variety, it has a somewhat jelly-like consistency. This renders it largely unsuckable. You are therefore forced to lick it.

I have reservations about licking. Quite apart from the mechanics involved, the word itself has suffered from years of unfortunate use in sycophantic contexts. Consequently, licking anything for an extended period of time does very little for one's self-esteem. And, of course, you miss out on the eternal pleasure of sucking.

The juicy variety does have one significant advantage: structural integrity. It is much less likely to detach itself from the stick midway through consumption, which means you have a considerably higher probability of actually finishing the candy you paid for.

Unfortunately, the same structural integrity does not extend to fluid management. The candy drips - frequently - and almost always from the stick end.

Your hands therefore become sticky much earlier in the process, leaving you to spend the rest of the experience wondering whether there is a socially acceptable way of dealing with orange syrup running down your fingers.

The Verdict

All said and done, the orange candy—icy or juicy—is the thing to have when you're taking a leisurely stroll after dinner. Or when you've parked somewhere with friends and are spending twenty minutes discussing where you should go for dinner.

Or when you're simply standing by the roadside and happen to encounter the ubiquitous ice-creamwale bhaiya. Perhaps that is part of its appeal. Nobody plans an orange candy - you encounter one. And for the next ten minutes, the most pressing question in your life is whether you prefer your orange candy icy or juicy. There are worse ways to spend an evening.

Disclaimer: These observations are entirely personal and based on individual sensory perception. No claim whatsoever is being made that this constitutes The Truth About Orange Candies. It is merely the point of view of one obscure individual who has apparently spent considerably more time thinking about orange candies than the subject warrants.